truth.

i have a good friend who loves to say: well, the truth hurts.

i really do agree to a large large extent.
how i wished i never get to know the truth.
let it bury down there within for 100 years.
and i'll be more than satisfied.
again and again.
i thought i've accepted it.
i thought i could understand things like an adult.
but just a string of words, it crushed all the rosy pictures i used to paint.
i'm still living like a child.
seeing things like a child.
it's so hard. to say, oh it happens... especially in this world we're living.
a world that disregards God.
people may think im strong.
people may think i can handle.
throw those thoughts away, people.
i may seem strong and can handle things,
but it's all because that little one inside me was hidden, carefully protected.

that little one was filled with guilt, regrets, insecurities and is weak.
but no, im not going to let things stay as it is.
im going to overcome it, and be a conqueror like God.




my dear friend, you saw how weak i can be, how insecure i can get.
and yet you didn't understand.
i was disappointed.
the fact that you saw yourself more than anything else.
but a promise is a promise.